The U.N. Staff


Seriously, what are we going to do with the leftover zombies?

A Point/Counterpoint with Velma Schmidt and Hiram Magruder
March 1, 2006

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Aim High Land Lubber!

Nautical Musings

by Captain Frubbins, S.S. Zelbess
Feb. 25, 2006

Afore and abaft I drift, sifting amidships

I cannot fathom a fathom unfouled, full and by trips

Muffled murderers and munions, miss-stays and monkey jackets

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Stage Direction

by Thelli Guntar Rosjes, Guldbagge Award Winning Director
Feb. 24, 2006

Yes. Yes. That's good. We've almost got it! Dare I say, this reminds me of my Tyven Tyven sessions as a young, aspiring director? Did I ever tell you about that time of my life, Kitya? Oh, it was so heady! So much success, so fast. We came an inch from winning the Jussi Award!

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Controversial Diet Popular Among Sports Fans

Feb. 20, 2006

Imagine watching sports constantly. Imagine losing weight while doing so. Does this seem impossible to you? Well one man begged to differ. Sargeant Nolan Navretill, who commands a group of border soldiers in Iraq had a great idea.

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Nincompoop Droppings

EA Sports Hopes To Reverse Madden Curse

by Gene Shalit's Afro
Feb. 16, 2006

The John Madden football video games have been a profitable video game franchise for Electronic Arts since its inception in the early 1990s. However, since the game began to use actual NFL players on the cover rather than Madden, it has led to a notorious phenomenon known as 'The Madden Curse.'

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A Public Service Announcement

Recognizing Leprosy

with the Underground Nincompoop
Feb. 15, 2006

If you have any of the following symptoms, you may have leprosy.

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Mentally-Ill, Homeless Bums Are Not Funny!

A Commentary by Larry Astrophizzix
Feb. 4, 2006

Is it I? Is it I? Is it I? Is it I? Scrambled eggs and pie! You owe me. You break it, you bought it, Peter Underdunk!!!!

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Peter Falk's Favorite Disney Movie Scenes

Feb. 2, 2006

Ya know as a shaman once told to me chru an interpretah, "Ya moments as a child ah dose dat shape you as an adult." This kind-hahted wuds echoed chru my head an' prompted dis ahticle. I want to share wit yas my faaaaaaaaavorite scenes from different motion pitchas. In particular I wanted to concentrate on da movies I grew up wit, being Disney animated films of course.

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Nincompoop Droppings

by Gene Shalit's Afro
Jan. 29, 2006

Breaking news from the world of theatre and its impact on American spectatorship: Sources are stating that prominent literary and theatrical associations across America are looking to radically change the theatre credits of the prominent Russian playwright, Anton Chekhov.

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Great Oaten's Raven!

by Dillon Farnum
Jan. 21, 2006

According to this article, the Democratic Party's "Home Affairs Spokesman" stepped down from his position over an alleged affair with his rent boy.

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